Sunday, June 28, 2009

so, it's almost July--here are the goals...


july
Originally uploaded by Kudzu and Koolaid

grace that amazes...

tonight I talked with someone after church. She and her husband visited both this morning and tonight.

she was cheerful & fun and her beauty was radiant.

she was a grandmom and Iwas amazed. I mean I want to look like that when I'm a grandmom. :)

she was open and honest and sweet and
well
you (or I)
just never imagined the pain she was carrying
the hurt and wondering

oh but she was
as we stood and talked for a while, she opened up a bit and shared a grief she was walking through.

all of my assumptions about her shiny happy life were put into perspective.

she was brokenhearted
hurt
and in pain

but she was breathing grace
living grace
because without it
she couldn't have made it.

I was reminded as we drove to Cracker Barrel to eat post service, that you simply never, ever know what people are walking through. You can think you know. You can assume based on what they show you. But sometimes people are carrying a pain that is heavy and hard.

I was touched by her choice to fall on grace...
to admit her not understanding things...
to admit that it wasn't fair...
to admit her anger...
and continued saddness.

I was drawn to her because despite a life that is not what she wanted or thought it would be-a life that has hurt her and disappointed her...

she was still beautiful
within

I was amazed by her grace.

[archives dive] Of toothpicks and telephone poles...

Of toothpicks and telephone poles...

And why beholdest thou the mote that is in thy brother's eye, but considerest not the beam that is in thine own eye? Or how wilt thou say to thy brother, Let me pull out the mote out of thine eye; and, behold, a beam [is] in thine own eye? Thou hypocrite, first cast out the beam out of thine own eye; and then shalt thou see clearly to cast out the mote out of thy brother's eye. Matthew 7:3-5 KJV

3 "Why do you look at the speck that is in your brother's eye, but do not notice the log that is in your own eye? 4 "Or how can you say to your brother, `Let me take the speck out of your eye,' and behold, the log is in your own eye? 5 "You hypocrite, first take the log out of your own eye, and then you will see clearly to take the speck out of your brother's eye. Matthew 7:3-5 NAS

Or like I had a friend in college say, ''it's toothpicks and telephone poles.



It's amazing how we as Christians, who only merit salvation purely through mercy and grace, so often don't extend those two things to others.
 We take for granted the journey of our sanctification...and hold others to the standards and place that we are, without allowing the Holy Spirit to do that work.
I know that there are those that would read my blog and see that I dared to put the KJV with the NAS and they would have no respect for this post or it's intent. And you know what? There is just nothing I can do about that. And to clarify my above statement. Salvation is not a process. Salvation is instantaneous. But sanctification IS a process. And it is the place from where my blog is rooted.

Why do we nullify the journey God has brought us on, and the place He has brought us to, by projecting 'our' place on others?
How sweet of God to love us, to cherish us...to fill us with His Spirit, to give us His Word, which contains all truth. And then for us to pompously and pridefully, sit in a place of holiness and decide that others ''aren't quiet on par'' because of _________ or __________. (you just fill in the blank with whatever pet thing you want)

I have a friend that illustrated it so beautifully. Being a Christian is like being in school. You have all grade levels represented from K-12 and you even have college, and post grad and doctoral dissertation writers too. :) But we are all students in God's school. But what happens? Well you are going along, growing and learning, thankful for the cross and the gift of salvation. Praising God for your relationship, seeking to know Him and to have Him known. Then you hit about 6th grade, and suddenly you look over and there, there is a 4th grader who has the audacity to have ''Air Supply'' cd's in her house. (oh the horror, no really, AIR SUPPLY??? ewwww lol) and then you really begin to look around and low and behold if one of your very classmates isn't partaking of some "Must See TV". Oh how ungodly are they? How can they name the name of Christ and listen to that, and fill their temple with that???

 Well see, you won't hear me defend the music or the TV shows. I won't. But you know what, this isn't about the music or the TV. It's about the heart of the student! The student looking around and not IN their own heart.The student naming names and calling sins. See, God purifies us, God sanctifies us. That is what God is in the business of doing. I earnestly believe that as we grow in the Lord and mature that things that we once had no issue with, will be something that we lay aside (Wherefore seeing we also are compassed about with so great a cloud of witnesses, let us lay aside every weight, and the sin which doth so easily beset [us], and let us run with patience the race that is set before us, Heb. 12:1) That is part of ''growing up in the Lord'

 But it's when *we* try to become the teacher and we try to grow others up to our ''height'' that the problem comes. Because it is at that time, that we have become filled with pride, with ''who we are'' and not whose we are, with ''what we know'' and not who we know. We lose focus on the grace and mercy that so sovereignly brought us to the place we are and that continues to grow us into who He wants us to become. If we could all (myself ,especially) stop looking around at our classmates and just keep our eyes on the Master Teacher, we'd spend a lot less time at recess calling our schoolmates names.

And thou shalt love the Lord thy God with all thy heart, and with all thy soul, and with all thy mind, and with all thy strength: this is the first commandment. Mark 12:30


More About Jesus

More about Jesus would I know,
More of His grace to others show;
More of His saving fullness see,
More of His love Who died for me.
More, more about Jesus,
More, more about Jesus;
More of His saving fullness see,More of His love Who died for me.

More about Jesus let me learn,
More of His holy will discern;
Spirit of God, my teacher be,Showing the things of Christ to me.

More about Jesus; in His Word,
Holding communion with my Lord;
Hearing His voice in every line,Making each faithful saying mine.

More about Jesus; on His throne,
Riches in glory all His own;
More of His kingdom’s sure increase;
More of His coming, Prince of Peace.


Friday, June 26, 2009

various

I have about 11 million misquito bitotes on my legs. I picked green beans tonight and was feasted upon by the bugs.

I have a sunburn...I'm not complaining.

I have to start working on AE's bday stuffs!

AE is sitting here watching "campop'' (camp rock! lol)

I have a rash on my arm. It happened a few weeks ago too and I thought it was a fluke-however now I've attached it to body oil I've been using. I guess I have some allergy --ad it. makes me sad, cause I loved that stuff.

I've been working on putting curriculum stuff together the last couple of days. I've almost got stuff all together.

I can't believe June is almost over-seriously, didn't we just have Christmas? LOL

and with all these tantilizing tidbits I'm off for the night. My head is swimming with about a million thoughts. I'm off to read for a bit. I hope the weekend treats you well.

some Friday happy...


FridayFelicities
Originally uploaded by joymombecky
Things making me happy...make your list....post it...sign Mr. Linky over at Bedky's! (www.beckyperry.us)

--sleeping in

--coffee

--a little girl that loves swimming & swims like a fish with no fears

--boys that get super dee dooper excited about a movie

--grace for the moment

What's making you happy today?

Tuesday, June 23, 2009

Things I am really, really enjoying so far this summer...

Sun-lots of time in the sun...sunscreen & reading. Vit D is making me a happy person.

Psalms, Proverbs, Phillipians, E.M. Bounds, Brother Lawrence

THIS stuff has been magic this summer ...with all the sun and chlorine (plus the fact my hair is color treated) it could be a mess--but that conditioner is keeping my hair soft and preebee!

THESE are my new love. Swoon!!!!!

I realize you probably already are aware of the AWESOME that is Pandora.com...but if not, UM, why haven't you discovered it??? Pandora is just awesome.

Oh, and THIS is my favorite post pool lotion....it smells like a dreamcicle. :)

Monday, June 22, 2009

Goings on...

goings on

Figs growing
sunburned noses
messes of squash
bountiful gardens
old tractors
cute CUTE puppies
cholorined eyes
chickens and chicks
roots!
promises of cucumbers soon!
finally, a level pool
beans galore
hot exhaused kitties

I love summer. :)

Now it's almost time for supper--fried squash, oh how I love thee! :)
and
I started a new book for review
yay!
I still haven't started reading ''to kill a mockingbird''
but I will
and I have to find a history resource for this fall for the 3rd and 5th grader.
any suggestions?

Sunday, June 21, 2009

Sunday Evening Post...

I'm properly sun tired and looking forward to bedtime.

This past week has contained an utter basketful of things I never imagined. My heart is breaking for friends walking through pain they never volunteered for--it's times like this that it's hard to grasp how ''all things work together for good.'' However, I know they do. I *know* God is good. I know He has a *good* plan. I know He has gone before and provided they way--even when the circumstances and happenings seem so painful. He is there-right in the middle of it. There is a comfort in that assurance--even when everything is swirling and crazy. God. is. good. period.

I have spent this week in Mitford. I'm reading "Light From Heaven" the last in the Mitford series. I love this series of books. I remember a few years ago referring to them as my ''favorite blue jeans'' of books. They are quaint and sweet and simple and comfortable and home. I used to try to be a fast reader--and I can be--but one thing I've done lately is slow down and enjoy reading, for readings sake. I used to have several books going at one time--now I'm only reading one at a time.

My days this past week were filled with lots of manual labor (pool pics soon), sun time and reading as I fell asleep. I don't think there is a better feeling than working hard, physically pushing yourself to your limit and then retiring for the night with about 30 mins of a book.

I think I spent maybe an hour and a half in total on the computer this week. You know what...I didn't miss it. My days and the damands of them are shifting. It's kind of neat. lol

There is a quote in Light From Heaven that I'll be posting-it's settled in with me and made its home in my mind--it's a good one. :)

For now, it's time to rub a little girlie who is sunkissed with some after sun lotion and get her to bed.

I hope the week ahead holds good things for you.

Monday, June 15, 2009

Monday, Monday...

Our trip to South Carolina was nice. We spent Saturday at Folly Beach--so pretty, and uber mega crowded. :)

I spent a lot of time thinking-about a lot, and nothing in particular.

I enjoy blogging, but I don't know how faithful I'll be this summer. I don't want to feel like I HAVE to update...but I also know I hate when I read a blog and they just don't update. KWIM With that being said. I promise to blog updates regarding my ''alive and active'' progress. I will have some book reviews too. I just don't think it's going to be a daily thing.

Today Elijah has therapy from 10:30-12:00 then we have the rest of the day in front of us. I really need to start working on our school year calendar and laying out holidays etc.

Right now, I need coffee. :)

Sunday, June 14, 2009

Hope

Now to him who is able to do in full measure more than all our desires or thoughts, through the power which is working in us. Eph. 3:20

Saturday, June 13, 2009

Saturday Something...

I don't remember how I found Nie Nie's blog...

I know that I spent every Saturday morning, in Montana soaking up her stuff from the week.

Seriously.

I wouldn't read her blog all week-I would save it for Saturday.

I would get up early, fix coffee and read Stephanie.

She made me happy. She made the day to day of life something to celebrate.

She gloried in her girliness...in her home...in her family.

I fell in love with her blog. With her creativity. With her passion.

I woke one Saturday morning to find Stephanie had been in a near fatal plane crash.
That is when the world met Stephanie.
She has thousands of blog readers now-she is spreading that sunshine still.
In the midst of very hard days she still glories in her girliness.
She still adores her kids.
She still loves her Mr. Nielson.
She is still passionate.
She still inspires.

Today I share with you Nie Nie.
Go.
Get some coffee.
Read the archives.
She's amazing.


{today is also my college friend, Jennifer (Thompson/Dugger's) bday. I have no idea if she still reads--but if so...HAPPY HAPPY HAPPY BIRTHDAY NAMEBRAND :D

Friday, June 12, 2009

Friday! Yay! Friday!

Friday Felicities was started by Nattie Rose York-the little things that make you happy. Post yours and then drop by Bedky's and sign Mr. Linky.




--road trips

--friendships

--grace

--music and memories

--hope

--diet coke & coffee

--the ocean

Things making my week:

Things making my week...

Surprise sunflowers...finishing up a fun STAR crochet project...gardinias-even though I think the scent is overwhelming, these line the driveway and offer their gift to me every night when I'm out stargazing...flip flops with sparklies make forhappy feet!

I'm off to South Carolina for the weekend.

I'll possibly have some post up over the weekend-if I have some extra time to get them together.

Otherwise I'll see you Monday.

Thanks for reading.

Happy Weekend.

Thursday, June 11, 2009

100 Things

about me.
I've done this on every blog.
Since I am procrasting packing - here we go.

1. my name is cheri (shu ree...like marie...only sh rie) I have never met anyone that said it correctly.

2. My nickname growing up was Ri Ri...then Ri. My family still calls me Ri Ri. It makes me happy.

3. I was born in Georgia-but have lived in several states: Alabama (twice!), Mississippi, Kansas, Texas, New Mexico & Montana.

4. I've lived in a lot of cities in Georgia: Carrollton, Bremen, Tallapoosa, Auburn, Cleveland, Sand Hill (villa rica-ish)

5. I am 36 years old.

6. I love and adore my birthday-more than is normal.

7. I sing.

8. My first solo I was 4 and sang "He Did It All For Me"

9. I like to clean and organize things.

10. I put my dust pan and my trash can lid in the dishwasher.

11. I clean my washing machine & vaccum.

12. I don't care about other peoples stuff/junk/organization--that doesn't bother me, but *I* like to organize my stuff. You can do whatever you want to do.

13. I like music.

14. I will watch movies over and over if Ilike them. I have seen "You've Got Mail" no less than 50 times.

15. I also love Kate and Leopold.

16. Clearly, I am a fan of Meg Ryan. :)

17. I have neat handwriting.

18. I learned to crochet 3 years ago and I really, really love it. Like, love it like an old lady.

19. I am loud.

20. I am generally funny.

21. I am way sarcastic.

22. I am not easy to get to know. I mean, really get to know.

23. I like people-most of the time.

24. I am judgmental by default.

25. I am being humbled-daily.

26. I like water with lime.

27. I love chocolate.

28. Coffee makes me way happy.

29. I have never had alcohol.

30. #29 is not me 'bragging' I'm just saying-I've never had it--and it holds no appeal for me.

31. I have four kids.

32. 3 boys.

33. 1 girl

34. we are at the beginning of bday season...girl in july, boy 2 in august, boy 1 in Sept and boy 3 in October.

35. I homeschool and I am thankful I am able too.

36. I love road trips.

37. I have flown one time.

38. I am not scared of flying-but I don't like it so much. I'd rather drive. Even with four kids.

39. I am insecure.

40. I care what people think.

41. I am often intimidated.

42. I don't think most people realize #39, 40 or 41.

43. I love to cook.

44. I love to bake.

45. I love to lose myself in a book.

46. I love good conversation.

47. I love laughing.

48. I prefer showers.

49. I like a bath...BUT it is always followed by a shower.

50. I don't understand sitting in your dirt and not washing it off. LOL

51. Diet Coke is my vice of choice.

52. I like words.

53. I like blowing bubbles.

54. I like catching lightening bugs.

55. I wonder if I will ever feel like an adult.

56. I am going back to college.

57. My previous stint in college was great socially. :)

58. This go round I'm focusing on academics.

59. College was probably some of my best memories.

60. I get my feelings hurt pretty easily.

61. This is another thing that isn't something people readily guess about me.

62. I wear a size 11 shoe.

63. It was a 9 before kids.

64. I had 4 kids in 7 years.

65. I was either pregnant or nursing for 10 years straight.

66. My body totally looks like I was pregnant or nursing for 10 years straight-regardless of weight loss.LOL

67. I was not attractive pregnant-I was fat. LOL

68. I can almost palm a basket ball.

69. I am 5 ft 6.5 inches tall.

70. I really, really, really want to be 5'9''

71. I love flip flops.

72. Fall is my favorite season.

73. Well, it ties with Spring.

74. Christmas is my favorite holiday.

75. Other than my birthday.

76. I love prizes.

77. Not expensive stuff ...but little things that let me know you were thinking of me.

78. I have a good memory for bdays and numbers.

79. "Great Is Thy Faithfulness'' is my favorite hymn.

80. My hair is long.

81. My hair is naturally blonde-but went pretty dark with each pregnancy. Thus I started coloring it and I've been every shade from blonde to red. Right now I'm blonde. It feels right.

82. My hair is longer now than it's been in a long, long time. I fight having it cut daily.

83. I don't have a favorite color-it changes.

84. I secretly would love to be a writer. A really good writer who's (edited "whose" dude...Pattie you let that slide... :D ) words touch people.

85. I love khaki and black together.

86. My Daddy makes myheart smile.

87. We disagree and argue but at the core-he amazes me.

88. I love potatoes fried in a black skillet.

89. I love to take pictures.

90. Dogs are my favorite animals.

91. I am so not a fan of cats.

92. Kittens are ok-till they turn to cats. ;)

93. Sometimes I wish I could be 18 with the knowledge of now.

94. Psalm 27 is my favorite book & chapter of the bible...verse 14 is my favorite verse.

95. I love to sit at the ocean when it's dark and hear the waves crash, look into the sky with a million stars and whisper, ''wow''--because it is at that moment that I feel closest to God.

96. I admire quiet strength.

97. I love folding laundry.

98. I have a very keen sense of smell.

99. I love cemetaries-especially old cemetaries. (true!)

100. What else do you want to know...

Manic, uh, Thursday...

I slept in today...a lot like till 9:45 & folks that just doesn't happen.
I'm not going to excuse it away, either. I rarely sleep late-I sure am not going to apologize for it. :)

Today I have errands to do and my truck needs cleaned out desparately. I also have laundry and packing to do.

This time tomorrow I'll be heading to South Carolina for the weekend.
I hope yall have a good one.

Tuesday, June 9, 2009

Midnight Evaluations

I read an article once about looking back over your day and making judgments at midnight.
It basically said, you shouldn't.
Heh!

I don't know if I've mentioned it here, but a few weeks back my mom got one of those 4 ft above ground pools for the grandkids.

Set up in 15 mins

[waits for laughter to stop]

You should know that my parents live on an incline...
that makes for an unlevel pool.
You should also know it makes for about 3 weeks worth of work
on getting it set up

It has included two family gatherings with men folks using sand and math to level pool...
filling it up
it being oval instead of round and not filling correctly...
so then
we (well, that would be my Dad) spends about $500 on lumber
and at yet another family gathering
the menfolk build a platform
lots of time
sweat
leveling
sweeeeeeeeeeeeeeet
level
pool
fill that baby up

er
um
uh

it was all good
till
it wasn't
and the weight of the water
and a few of the braced 2x4's didn't agree
and the 2x4's broke
thus buckling the plywood platform
and making it jut up into the bottom of the pool
thus
making it have to be drained
so that a hole isn't punched into the liner

so
here we are
three weeks later
three attempts later
and no pool
but a lot of disappointment

My life, today, at this midnight evaluation, feels a lot like that pool (to use it as a metaphor).
And that sounds way dramatic-huh?
But if I had to be honest.
That's what I'd tell you.

I feel like I've done things.
I've worked on things.
I've tried.
and I've failed.

and here I am
all this time later
all these tries later
and still no pool
but a good bit of disaappointment.

(again, dramatic, no?)

I've never been where I am in my life before...
and it's not where I ever imagined I would be...

and yet here I am
trying to get it level
again

Just breath...

That has become my motto as of late...

just breath...

questions surround me...
ideas...
thoughts...
contridictions in thoughts...
opinions...
peoples words...

it all swirls and cycles and my brain hurts.

I can rest in knowing God knows. I can rest in knowing that I can trust that.

I can also admit my human-ness, and how easily I get swept into it all.

Some days are hard.

Those days I remind myself....

just breath.

Monday, June 8, 2009

Simple Summer

For Today...

Outside my window... I see the sun shining and butterflies flitting around the butterfly bush

I am thinking... of what needs to get done today and this week--making mental list...

From the learning rooms... school is done we will be working on some stuff & I am excited about getting the basement ready for school this fall.

I am thankful for... the little things, for family and for friends

From the kitchen...coffee so far this morning...

I am wearing... cozy clothes-black bottoms with tiny pink polka dots & a huge black tee.

I am reading... The Spirit of Sweetgrass, Psalms, Proverbs

I am hoping... to enjoy this summer like never before...

I am creating... a star afghan


I am praying... for grace, moment by moment

Around the house... chatter from AE...background noise provided by History channel, boys in the other room doing their puter time for the day.

One of my favorite things... summer days full of summerness. :)

A few plans for the rest of the week... Therapy today for Elijah...going to Bremen this afternoon to get the cousins for ''cousins camp'' this week...church on Wednesday...cleaning up the truck...packing...leaving Friday to take the kiddos to see their Dad in Charleston for the weekend...yay, for the ocean....yay for roadtrips.

Here is a picture thought I am sharing with you...
DSC_1937

hee, my birthday weekend shirt...

Summer 09--alive & active

It seems I am a planner.
There is nothing I love better than a little organization of ideas, a clean crisp notebook and handwritten list. :)
I love, love, love a good plan.
and
most every summer I have one.
I have these grand ideas-plans-goals.
and
they end up
starting with gusto and fizzling about midstream
but
they were well laid plans
and there is always next summer, right?

Well, enter Summer 09.
I have been thinking on our plan.
I had formulated one, even.
However
we are veering from the plan.
[gasp]
[sputter]
[choke]
...
Oh there is still an idea...
a guide in mind
but there is no
outline and chart for progress
just an idea
and the idea is this...

ALIVE AND ACTIVE

from June 8-Sept 8
my motto
will be
alive and active

(now granted our summer won't run that long--honestly we'll start school mid August)

This summer I want to:

-lay out in the sun, a lot [with sunscreen, hee, but the sun makes me happy and makes me feel alive...so it totally fits the criteria for summer 09 checklist!]

-read a lot [we have some summer read alouds. I want to read some fluff. I want to read some challenging and thought provoking stuff. I'm going to saturate myself in Psalms & Proverbs. I'm reading To Kill A Mockingbird with my niece for her 9th grade honors English summer reading.

-lose 30 pounds. [find my collarbones, lose my baby belly-since my baby will be 4 (FOUR!) in July. LOL] (and well, Cheri will never be skinny-heh, it's one of those impossibilities and so not that goal...I'm 36, I've birthed and fed 4 kiddos--I am not, so, so, so not ever going to be hottt. LOL--and I'm ok with that, truly. But I can be better. We're aiming for better. :) [toning up the arms...lunges for the butt...pilates for lean muscle...hee, cheri and lean...um, yeah--ok....but true, I can work with what I have and rearrange it a bit--that's the goal. :) ]

-walk a lot (every.stinking.day.)

-water, drinking a whole, heckuva lot water.

-journalling (paper/pen/writing)

-quilt (whispers this...I want to make a quilt...my church has a weekly quilting circle...I can really learn this)

-cleaning out the basement (we are totally setting up a school room down there...it will be ideal but it will be a project that will be a summer long deal SO EXCITED)

-get school together. I will be schooling all four kiddos in August. I will be bulding most of the curriculum.

-live intentionally & I know this is so one of those ''sayings''...and I know I have said it myself. But I really, truly want to LIVE this summer. To be alive and active. To be with my kids, to participate in the moment to moment. To spend lazy days reading and watching old movies and laughing and catching lightening bugs. Just living. I am far too worried most of the time about the next thing or busy doing what has to be done--this is a weakness of mine...and one I want to address and work on this summer.

I want to look back at this list in September and smile. I want to read it with eyes that are clearer because more time has been spent in the fresh air and sunshine. I want the fingers that type the Sept update to be a summer bronze. I want more words in my vocabulary from books that expanded my thinking. I want a heart that loves Jesus more, because of time spent in His Word. I want a mind that is refreshed and ready for a new school year. I want a body that is stronger in might and in spirit (and a size 10 wouldn't hurt my feelings. Hee!) I want a life that is lived in the moment, creating opportunities to love and show the love of God to others. I want to look back at the summer of 09 and know that while it was one with lots of changes and challenges and sometimes it was hard to breath--that I made it and that I am stronger. I am better. I am more, than I was--I want to surprise myself.

Welcome, summer.

Sunday, June 7, 2009

birthday bullets


*road trips to pick up cousins
*ice cream celebrating last days of school
*loud fun music & lots of laughing
*swimming in odd shaped pools
*fish frys with people that make you a better person
*14 yr old boys trying to impress pretty 14 yr old girls (hee!)
*fun conversations with random people in stores--because clearly it's my mission to talk to everyone I encounter :D
*hanging out with family
*building decks to level the pool so it won't be odd shaped
*making 40-11 trips to Lowes for 2x4 (both 8 and 10 feet long-just depending on which trip)
*trips to BJ's, buying bday cakes, having my name written REALLY BIG and my brothers (who's bday is June 20th...um, not so big! HEE!)
*making my Aunt Sharon put me as her wallpaper on her phone (hee!)
*sparklers and poppers
*hugging Jeremy (my cousin, who is like a brother)
*black raspberry vanilla from bath and body works
*sensual amber from bath and body works
*java chip fraps from Starbucks
*jelly cream pies by little debbie ...scoff if you will...Mrs. Cathy gave me two boxes for my bday--she is my favorite.person.ever.
*preebee tiara that I wore all.stinking.day.
*birthday cash
*cards
*lots of cards
*Facebook--literally my page runneth over with love from my friends...it truly made me cry
*ice cream socials
*my little church singing happy birthday to me
*my little girl singing happy birthday to me
*my boys tolerating their momma's crazy (hee!)
*preebee toes
*chocolate cake with chocolate fudge butter cream frosting
*my favorite movie that makes me happy-every.time.
*memories
the good ones, even if they are hard ones, being able to remember--to feel, to know, to relive that moment, anytime I want-is a gift I can open anytime I need it to be real again.

It was a very, very, very, very, very good day.

Thirty-six, you are looking pretty promising.

And that makes me happier than you can imagine.

Birthday Queen


Birthday Queen
Originally uploaded by Kudzu and Koolaid
Today I am 36.

Thirty-six.

The last few years have not been the best of birthdays, however, this year has more than made up for them.

It has been fabulous.

I am blessed.

I love my birthday.

Saturday, June 6, 2009

From the archives...

[my birthday post from last year]

Life...
So, I'm thirty-five.
Yesterday, my actual birthday, I was not in a very good mood after getting up. I wasn't in a bad mood-but I had kind of sidestepped the fact that Nattie had been gone a year on my birthday. I had successfully avoided thinking about it - much. But it hit me Saturday morning and that along with just some general blahs worked to make my birthday, not so enjoyable. We salvaged the evening with dinner out and ice cream and cake & declared today a 'do over' day.
So today-after waking up late and missing the early service at church we headed out for a day of fun in the sun. We went to a local state park to swim. The sun was hot (105) but the water initally walking in was CHILLY (it's spring fed), after getting adjusted we began to splash and swim and have a really good time. About an hour and a half into our fun-we noticed a commotion on the other side from us and then after a series of events about 20 mins later a young teens body was pulled from the water. I witnessed someone drown today. It all happened very fast, and it was surreal. We didn't really know what was going on & it was across the way from us so we couldn't hear what was going on but soon the pieces came together.
Upon seeing the body surface, I immediately started crying and I just prayed, right there, out loud. I grabbed my kiddos hands and prayed like we do when we see an ambulance go by or a car wreck we pass. I prayed for God to be there, to be with them & I just cried. I heard a momma crying in agony and my heart broke into a million pieces. The pain of watching that, I cannot, I never, ever, ever want that to be me. Of course the lifeguards and staff/park rangers were adminstering CPR . We were tidying up our stuff and getting ready to leave as the amublance arrived.
We headed back toward home and stopped at McDonalds and grabbed cokes and let the kids run around and play in the playland. The kids understood the kid was injured and possibly was going to die-but (thankfully--is it wrong to say that?) they were also kind of oblivious to how serious it was -- all that had happened. Anyway, they ran and played. I drank Diet Coke and keep singing from "Blessed Be Your Name" in my head...

Every blessing You pour out I'll turn back to praise
When the darkness closes in, LordStill I will say
Blessed be the name of the Lord
Blessed be Your name
Blessed be the name of the Lord
Blessed be Your glorious name

Blessed be Your name
When the sun's shining down on me
When the world's 'all as it should be'
Blessed be Your name
Blessed be Your nameOn the road marked with suffering
Though there's pain in the offering Blessed be Your name

I believe the words of that song, so strongly. I do. But I don't understand. I don't understand pain. I don't understand suffering. I don't understand a young mother dying and leaving children. I dont' understand molested children. I don't understand cancer and babies with birth defects. I don't understand suffering and pain and hurt and the cries of a mother watching them bring her lifeless child to the surface.
But I understand God. In the very middle of the foggy haze of my limited human understanding, I know in my soul that God IS good. GOD IS GOOD. The world may not be good. The choices people make may not be good. The results of living in a world of sinful people may not be good. BUT GOD IS GOOD.
When the darkness closes in, Lord, still I will say Blessed Be The Name of the Lord.

Friday, June 5, 2009

Things making me happy...


a bee in the tree
Originally uploaded by Kudzu and Koolaid
-really good coffee
-birthday weekends full of family and fun
-cards, lots of cards-making me smile
-chocolate
-diet coke
-no calories counting till Monday. Hee!


I hope you are set to have a great weekend.
We are off to pick up my nieces and nephew in a bit from their last day of school. Then they are spending the weekend.

For now I'm off to have more coffee--enjoy your Friday & your weekend.

Thursday, June 4, 2009

what's going on around here...

[for Rhonda]
[if you click through any photo it will take you to Flickr to the complete photoset]
[picture heavy!]

pretty chicks

These are the baby chicks...they are all feathered out and are terribly cute. I'd be lying if I didn't tell you I don't love sitting around watching them. Chickens are fun & funny to watch. The next few are of two of this batch, both roosters and they are already fighting...which is cute too.(although you can't let them, becuase they will hurt each other, even this little)

dance with meeeeeeeeee...I want to be your partner can't you seeeeeeeeeeeeKeeeeewaaaaaaaaaaaaahdude I will so flog youI challenge you...

We put the garden in on Good Friday and it is blooming out and promising a summer of good stuffs! (yay!)

how does your garden grow

It's just a little managable patch with peppers, beans, squash, tomatoes and cucumbers.
Say what you will, squash blossoms are beautiful...

squash blossom

and finally AE wagging one of the poor kittens around...


AE & Sunshine

I'm 3 skiens into the star afghan I'm working on -- and while I don't love the colors (just using up stuff in my stash) I am loving the way it works up.

Tomorrow my nieces and nephew finish school for the year. We are celebrating. I'm picking them up from school and taking them for ice cream. We have a fish fry tomorrow night & a family (it's MY BIRTHDAY WEEKEND!!!!!) cookout on Saturday. Sunday IS MY BIRTHDAY (did you know? *grins*) and we are having an ice cream social after church Sunday night. It's going to be a good weekend. I'm going to be Thirty-sixteen. DUUUUUUUUUUUDE.

Wednesday, June 3, 2009

thinkerly


Nattie said ''thinkerly'' or at least I think it was Nattie. I've been thinking of her a lot lately. Two years ago, on my bday, Dana called to tell me Nattie had died. I can still remember the exact place I was standing when she said the words.


I feel so blessed to have known her, even if it was for a short span of time. I love that she introduced to the Mitford series of books. Anytime I reread those, I think of Nattie and I smile.


Nattie loved pedicures. She liked the color purple and she loved daisies-like me. Every year since she died I've painted my toenails purple for the month of June to honor her memory. Today I got my mani/pedi via the gift certificate my mom gave me for my bday. I spiced things up a little (Nattie would like that, I think) and got a french pedi only with purple tips & had then put a daisy on my toenail too.


I still miss her.

I am more than thankful that I was able to know her.

She was truly, Sparkly Nattie.

Le Sigh.
[tomorrow I have garden pictures and chicken pictures and little girl w/kitten pictures!]


Tuesday, June 2, 2009

Right now...

I'm sunburned...
ouch-my thighs are a lovely shade of red-eeek!

I have two kiddos sacked out. Exhausted from a long day, full of swimming and then playing with friends.

I have a crochet project that makes me happy--even though I don't love the yarn. (colors...ugh) I love the pattern. It's a star. It makes me happy.

My heart is breaking for a friend. A friend that has shown more grace in her situation than I think I am capable of mustering. She truly amazes me. Encourages me. I am praying for her--and so thankful for her example.

I'm reading The Spirit of Sweetgrass by Nicole Seitz. I read another of her books last year for review and fell in love with her writing.

Tomorrow I have a mani/pedi--that's a goooooooood thing.

It's my birthday week-that's a gooooooooooooooooood thing.

Today was a hard day in a lot of ways. My heart hurts today. But the thing is--this isn't it. It will get better. My Momma always says, ''this too shall pass'' & it will. There will always be bad days--but then, there are those days that take your breath. Those perfect days. They make all the bad days managable.

This is me.
Making it.
Day to day.

Now-the older boys are in bed & I have to do the trash run.
Tomorrow-after the mani/pedi. I get to resume 'farm duties' ...and
there will be chicken pictures
just for Rhonda. :)

And so it begins, again...

Yes, this used to be my craft blog-however, now, it will be *the* blog. I don't do well maintaining one blog...heh, so to think I can have 3-4-5 covering different things/areas (books I've read, homeschooling, crafting, gardening...) is just crazy.

So Kudzu & Koolaid has combined them all & you can look forward to a hodgepodge of a little bit of everything.

If you've stopped by, thanks! I've missed you.

I hope you are looking forward to a fabulous summer!