This clear and present danger...

It was August 19, 1994.

I had a date.
with the man I would go on to marry...
the man with whom I would share eight homes in five states...
the man I who would give me four children...
the man I would also divorce.

A date. A movie. Harrison Ford.

And we began.
And in that beginning I never, ever imagined the ending.

And I never, ever imagined the now.

Yet, now, is where we are...

August 16, 2012.
Almost eighteen years have passed.
Life happened.
Memories were made.
Laughter was shared.
Hearts were broken.

who knew that a movie title...would hold such significance so much time later...


Today I sit here at my keyboard and contemplate...

that man I loved...
and left...

is not the same man...
he is different...


a disease , cancer, now wages war in his body...
and he fights.

and he fights to win my heart, again...
and he fights to be a father to our children...
and he fights to beat an opponent he never challenged...

and I think about that movie...
and Jack Ryan ...
and while I would never fall for the Hollywood love story ending...
all neat and tidy...
because it just doesn't happen that way...

I am so thankful for the chance...
to roll the film again...
to see God work and deliver us...through...

this clear and present danger.

Will you pray for my family?

Please.

My heart will be forever thankful.